Being able to speak fluently is not enough if no one can understand what you’re trying to convey. This has happened numerous times, whereby someone would interrupt abruptly and change the subject, to one which they felt was more interesting. At first, it felt frustrating and puzzling. But after a couple of half-hearted replies, it was rather discouraging for me to continue the conversation.
From the many encounters, I have learnt that I beat around the bush too much, resulting in an unconstructive story. Ever since then, I try in vain to be concise and speak only when I have insightful comments. Unfortunately, this has only left me out all because I was trying to play it “safe”.
Besides being chatty, I realise people often misinterpret me. I may have unconsciously offended them and out of a sudden, we were unknowingly avoiding each other. It was then that I realized I misused the wrong body language which was not my intention. Perhaps, this made her feel uncomfortable around me.
Sometimes words and emotions are useless if the expression used cannot effectively convey my message. However, by acting on my emotions, people will have the wrong impression of my true personality. More often than not, my judgment is blinded by emotions and I voice my view without much thought. Only then, do I came to realize that my strong comment could have hurt someone.
For me, exchanging with words is a way to improve bonding between people. I need people to listen and give me advices to allow me to see the situation in question in a different light. This way I would not be obstinate and offend people unknowingly. Through better communication skills, I hope to be dear to the people who had advised me.
~ To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others. ~
4 comments:
Thanks, Yuanhua, for this highly critical self reflection.
I can infer from what you write that you might have taken this course in order to develop more effective skills. The first step in doing so is being aware of one's weaknesses. The next would be having a willingness to try new approaches. I can see that you are at that point. Let's work together to make you more effective!
Hello, Yuan Hua. I just read the reading material for this week and i think one of these will be quite useful in developing communication skill.
Check here.
According to the article, majority of our communication is nonverbal. Thus, maybe you can improve your nonverbal communication to cover your weakness in language expression.
Hope it helps.
Zhi Peng
Dear Hua Hua,
I can understand how you feel when messages sent could not be interpreted correctly. I had misunderstandings with friends when I was much younger and we ended up ignoring each other. Perhaps I was too young to understand the importance of maintaining good relationships with others. As I grew older, I have came to realize that good communication is vital in our daily lives. Hence, don’t be afraid to express yourself when u need to. Through experiences, guidance and practices, I’m sure we can master the skills of communication.
Cheers,
Peiling
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